My Two Favorite Dorks

My Two Favorite Dorks

Saturday, September 10, 2011

Roses are red, violets are blue

Roses are red

Violets are blue

Maybe if you've nothing nice to say

You're best off to wait and blog another day.

I'll admit this is how I've felt the last couple of weeks. When I recently told someone about my blog, I found myself saying, "I try not to write all about health stuff because I find it's kind of depressing and most people aren't really interested in reading about it." As soon as I said that I realized that my blog has been almost exclusively about my health adventures over the last year or so. (And that if someone didn't know me, they might think I was a total hypochondriac!) Which is not ideal, in my mind, but it really is the stuff I most enjoy writing about. It is therapeutic for me. So perhaps, in wanting to try to find a balance between keeping people informed and boring others to death, the thing to keep in mind is that my writing helps me. And maybe that is the purpose - I don't know.

In any case, in some ways it has been a hard couple of weeks. PT has dragged on helping only minimally while my leg has - for some reason - decided to start being in much more pain than ever before. Standing on it for even a minute or two will lead to pain sometimes so bad that it actually takes my breath away. Can you say not fun? The good thing is that as long as I stay moving, it is ok - took the dogs for a long walk downtown last night and it was basically fine. And, when I sit down, it almost instantly gets better, which I am also thankful for.

I had my initial visit at the neurosurgical doctor this week. I had zero nerve reflex on my right foot. I'm no doctor but that seems bad to me. The P.A., who I saw, said that means the problem is coming from the L5, the lowest vertibra. That there is something going on there affecting both the nerve signals and muscles in my leg and foot. Next step is an MRI. I had a horrible sinking feeling when I left the office. Like nothing good was going to come of all of this. Steroid injections? Surgery?? Not my idea of a good time. And by the way, why me?? With all this other shit I have to deal with.

But it is almost getting to the point where relief is welcome no matter the cost. I was thinking about how I used to be able to avoid irritating my leg during the first, I don't know, two years this was going on. But now, not so much - I can't avoid standing for god's sake! And when I think about the ways that it has changed the way I live my life, especially with exercise and yoga, well, let's just say that surgery (if an option) is no longer entirely out of the question. Which is a pretty huge thing for me to say. I really think that my goal of all this to to be pain free/minimal pain at least, to have greater range of movement, and to get back to yoga. Life just isn't the same without it.

In the meantime, I am (sometimes) barely getting by on Aleve, muscle relaxers and ice. I honestly don't know that the pills are doing any good. Oh, and my PT exercises. Still doing those. Sometimes they help. And others, like this morning, they seem to do nothing at all.

Drug Study: Even though I haven't been able to exercise my normal amount, I have seen my PFTs go up a little bit in this drug study I'm doing with a new inhaled antibiotic. I don't know if I am on the placebo or not. In any case, it is extremely awesome that even though the rest of me is sub-par that my lungs are totally hanging in there!!

Another great thing right now is that work is going awesome. I am busier and happier and more challenged than I ever have been. Also been doing a lot more writing and editing, which I enjoy (especially the editing.) I've been working more hours than usual and - being very conscious of getting enough rest at night - again, my body is holding up really well. And that's great.

Coming up: still waiting to see when a good time will be to go up north to see my new nephew Simon!! We are starting to think about planning some trips for next year. And, of course, hockey season is right around the corner. :)

Tonight we are going to celebrate my oldest friend Erica's birthday. Been looking forward to it all week!

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